Thanksgiving Wellness

Hello Holiday Hottie!
​The holidays are here!!

...and no matter if you are a traditional gal with one or two visits on the day, whether you host and do it big, whether you do a small vegan celebration with one or two of your people, whether you have many celebrations that last weeks, whether you are anti-colonial and don't celebrate, or whether its just another day for you- I'm with you. (I get it...and have played in all of those arenas.)

Holidays have always been a busy time with clients because all our "shit" comes up. It's totally normal. And no matter what defense mechanisms we use to cover it up or how much we've worked on things- things can still surface. We face dynamics wedon't have to during the rest of the year. Then add a little (or a lot!) of alcohol into the mix and/or some great family dysfunction- we can have a recipe for disaster if we don't have a plan in place.

So this week, I want to give you some loving tips for self-care, protection and joy- no matter what your circumstances. And...know that you are loved- and deserve your needs fulfilled in all the ways too!

Maybe you aren't sensitive or get drained by events- if not, then knowing these tips for those who are can make you a caring and compassionate advocate for them.

First- my only hard and fast rule:
No big gestures, family clearing or fights this week- okay?? No matter who you are, if you are on my list- you and your peeps have probably had a tiring fuck of a year. So let's wait until after the vulnerable, and sometimes tense, get-togethers are over before we deal with the patterns in our groups. Instead- let's work on breathing and flowing through these days, getting as much nourishment as you can. And maybe some fun and joy- no matter how different things are.

LIST OF TIPS
Set an intention for yourself
How do you want to feel and/orwhat do you want from the event? We are setting intentions all the time- we may just become aware of it. Doesn't have to be anything big- maybe just "have fun," "not worry so much and enjoy my peeps," "don't let other peeps take my energy hostage" or even "only have two beers so I don't punch creepy uncle in the nuts." (that might only be me...lol) Making a conscious intention helps keep our energy focused.

Breathe and ground
The best way for your system to feel safer, and to react in a more relaxed way is to breathe deeply and feel connected to the earth. If you have time for a quick 5-10 minute yoga, breathing or meditation session, this can make all the difference in the world going around "the peeps."

Put protection around you
I like to have clients put a bubble (or a fortress) of protection around them. Or call in guides to come with and look over. Seems to help every time. And...it's energy science that works!

Don't let people suck your energy
This is up to us. It's sometimes hard to not get sucked in. Take note of when you feel tired after interacting with someone. Spend limited time or...oh look, it's time for deviled eggs! Avoid them altogether. Its our responsibility to protect ourselves from the energy suckers...

Take breaks
Oooh- take all the breaks. Go get some air, go hang out with the dog(s), hide in the bathroom and text or watch funny video, go meditate in your car. Taking breaks will ensure that we are not exhausted and (as) irritated by the end of the day or next day. This stuff is no joke. 

Give yourself permission to shift energy or plans anytime
If you want to leave early, not help with cookies, or are hosting and don't want to make something that you were going to, then don't. Spoiler alert- no one really cares- and if they do, that's their shit. You aren't there to solely fulfill their needs. I mean...really. 

Go for a walk 
Some of us go into the "freeze" stress state and moving the energy helps a ton. And hey, a dance party works too, if it fits...

Know that you are as important as everyone else!
A lot of us people pleasers put others in front of ourselves and then feel like shit afterwards. Remind yourself that you don't have to be a narcissist to know that your wants and needs are important. 

Have support
Set up one of your peeps, there or somewhere else, that you can connect with if you need to. My friends and I have a pact, that we are allowed to text each other for venting or support. If you have just one person, that's awesome- if not, journal. During my times of burn down when I had no one, I spoke into my phone or journaled to get the shitty energy out of my body so I would stay stable(ish- who's kidding anyone here) and not get sick. 

Plans of advocation
For you and others. If you are in charge of younger humans- please talk to them about the rules of what is acceptable and not acceptable for how others treat them, and what they are allowed to do and should do if something happens that makes them feel uncomfortable. And, it's not okay to let elders do things to our children that are unethical or go against body autonomy. I work with effects of this way too much so please, don't let people abuse your kids in order to be polite, or you are an accomplice. (Sorry, GenX'ers, we need to be told...things have changed, thank the Gods!)

Have a 911 plan
If things go south, have an exit plan. Make sure your safe people know this and what you are going to do should you feel like its too much for you. Our systems need to know that we will take care of them- then we can relax better and enjoy the day.

There's my list! I hope some of it can help you in some way. ​These some tidbits that have helped my clients along the way so we don't have to clean up the messes later.​ 

In the last couple of decades as we are continuing to stand up, speak up, advocate, and work through things more and more, it's getting better- but we still have work to do.  

You've got this. I love you. Have an amazing holiday, have some fun- and get plenty of rest. 

Opposums, Owls, Eagles, Mice...Oh My!!

So part two of the great animal spirit guide story from last week…

After we saw the armadillo in session for my amazing client, she came back the next week for her session. I asked her how things were, and she replied with her “not bad,” (which was her norm if things were not exploding around her). Many young people right now are having huge, and very fast, spiritual lessons and flow happening. And when you are on “a path,” things can sometimes go hyper-speed.

She then sat down and told me that the energy has been “weird” (I hear that a lot…). I asked her how and she said she wasn’t sure, but that there seemed to be a lot going on.

Then she randomly told me that an owl had woke her up the night before. She said she usually doesn’t hear the owls on her side of the house, but that her parents had spoke of it before. She mentioned that there was a field in the back of the house- and I stated that it was probably hunting. She agreed and stated that she went outside to see if she could see the owl, and it looked right at her. She even thought it looked “through her” and it was odd.

I recalled that I had seen a hawk with my son the morning before on the way to school. That my son had thought it had a mouse dangling, but I had realized that it was definitely not a mouse- because that’s usually what we see hawks and owls catch. But it was wayyyy too big for that. And that is was probably a baby opossum. We both made sad faces and I said “circle of life,” and we moved on.

Her eyes brightened and she said “oh yeah, I saw an opossum in the middle of the road driving home last night.” It, too, was looking right at her.

I talked about how animals will keep showing up in order for you to get guidance and understanding from them. And how they all have symbolic meanings and we can look them up if she wanted.

”Yeah, its been pretty weird, I saw a bald eagle circling me leaving school last night.” Hmmm, we both thought that was weird.

And then…she told me that a MOUSE had was in the music room at school when she got there and was freaking everyone out. There was much chaos and screaming- and she walked through the melee to her seat. Suddenly the mouse made a bee line for her desk and stopped right in front of her. Everyone paused in the class and you could hear a pin drop. She froze and just looked at the little cutie, then it went up a couple of steps that made it level to her face, and just sat there. Everyone was bewildered- and eventually the mouse found a space behind her and stayed there for the rest of class.

”That’s a lot of stuff to have happen in a week,” I said.

”When was the opposum?”

”Last night.”

”Oh, when was the owl?”

”Last night.”

”When was the eagle?”

”Yesterday after school.”

”And the mouse was today??”

”Yep.”

”What are you, Snow White??!”

She laughed modestly “I guess so.”

”So all this happened within the last 24 hours?? That’s crazy. There has to be message in all of that. Especially if its right before your appointment, don’t you think??” We agreed.

I went to grab my reference book “Animal Speak” and started doing intuitive readings on the animals to see if any of it resonated.

Not surprisingly, it was all spot on. One part, she said, about being affixed to something and not “looking” at other options- that the universe can guide you, but you think you are missing out when you don’t get what you are obsessed about. And that actually there is something way better out there for you.

And that what she hadn’t told me, is the college that she had decided one had changed its policies and she wouldn’t be able to go there anymore because of other circumstances.

I tuned in, and then said with as much balance as I could “I bet there is something that is more you- that is what you are meant to be and do, and fits the great person that you are.”

Then the image of Jane Goodall. Her animal connection. Her spirituality. Her environmental activism. And how she is so very connected. She let me gush about her and my knowledge about her. When I was done, she said, yeah, I used to be obsessed with her.

She also mentioned that she never wanted a mediocre life- and wanted to do something that mattered. And that animals and nature were always more comfortable than people. I brought up the fact that going to a college that she wanted to go to, but not knowing what she wanted to do yet…maybe the Universe had something beyond mediocre for her. Maybe she was being led into a life that was more magical than she could ever dream. Heck, maybe she was supposed to go work with Gooddall Institute!

We talked more about National Geographic and traveling, and drinking the nectar out of life. All the possibilities and opportunities that were available- that had to be shown after other doors closed.

And maybe the animals should show her the way. Who knows?? But we can stop. And listen. And learn.

That night, I received a text from her- a picture of an armadillo statue and the message stating “Just got sat right next to this guy at the Texas Roadhouse. Crazy!!”

I replied with several laughing emojis and an “Omg!” because we knew this wasn’t an accident. We knew this was another confirmation that Spirit is everywhere, in so many ways, to guide us, let us know that we are on the right path, and that we are not alone. The guidance can come in ways that make sense to us- if we only ask, and are open to receive.

I can’t wait to see what happens next for her. She’s amazing. Our work together reminds me that with all the trauma and beauty, and the ups and downs of life, the best thing we can do is stay anchored to what is perfect and never lies. Nature, animals, Spirit, and truth- are just some of those things that I get to witness everyday helping people heal. What amazing medicine we have access to. If you only show up and listen.

Off you go, amazing badasses- connect and heal! Spirit, and I, have got you! And please let me know your stories- they are just so amazing!!

Well, That’s an Interesting Animal Totem…

Sometimes when you ask for higher connection- you just might get it. But not always in the way that you think…and it just might make you laugh your butt off. Yep- the Universe has a great sense of humor.

I had a young lady client who came in this week to continue to working on things. The week before I had received got the message that she needed energetic protection at school- and what "showed up" was a wall of rainbow colored butterflies. I asked her if that made sense, and she laughed and said that she used to have rainbow butterflies on her wall. And yes, that would make her feel good and safe. 

She told me that she had been using the the wall of butterflies and it had really helped her that week at school- and the anxiety had decreased even more. In the past, and with her trauma, she always looked pretty capable, so no one knew she was suffering so much. She had felt very alone, but now we were just getting to the place that she felt like she could trust some people some of the time- and that she may not have to feel alone all the time.

So she asked me "when you say, 'put it out there,' or 'ask for the help from Spirit when I feel alone,' what do you mean by that? How exactly do you tap into their higher power?"

I explained that it shows up differently for everyone. That it depends on what your belief systems were, what made sense for her, and what her relationship to the Universal Energy was. I told her that she could use anything- and if nothing came to her, she could borrow one until something showed up for her.

I encouraged her that maybe she could ask Spirit to show her a sign. We talked about the different ways they could show up. Like passed love ones, a deity, angels, archangels, gods or goddesses of any sort, animals, or random characters. She could just pick what felt good to her- and it would work out for her.

Then I "got a message." I "saw" a critter on the ground next to her. I couldn't make out right away, but it was not your usual animal totem. And I realized- it was...an armadillo.

I paused, and took a breath to get ready to go into this explanation. I giggled akwardly and and then hesistantly said: "well, for some reason, I am seeing an armadillo for you. Does that make any sense?" I cringed, like I always did after delivering a message- always wondering for a few seconds I was going crazy.

She laughed smoothly and then said "Omg, I can't believe you said that!! My best friend has an armadillo bobble head in her truck. It's my favorite place to be. Being with her and my other friend (we nicknamed him "Woobie" because he instantly grounds and calms her when he comes around...), we would drive around in her truck- and she had this crazy armadillo."

“You mean your badass friend that you love who moved to Texas? The one who said she could come and kick those mean girls' asses for you?"

Yup.

I told her that these are just parts of us that we can't tap into. Her friend the warrior, until she had the strength- and the armadillo, you know, who lives in Texas now...they are all part of her Spirit Guides. And she could use the symbolism of the armadillo- for the armor and protection.

Maybe she was ready to have more than the butterflies- for all the things that she was going through right now. We did her energy balancing treatment and finished up.

On the way out, I grabbed an animal totem book that had the spiritual symbolism of animals. Never anything I "believed in" in the beginning of my work. But when animals started showing up repeatedly, I finally looked them up- and like all the work that showed up for me, it always made sense for what my clients were working on.

So I looked up armadillo and intuitively read the explanation for her (a work that I do where I can only "see" the words that pertain to the client I am working with...)

This is some of what it said: The armadillo carries it’s protection with them- and how to use it only when necessary- and that is has the ability to protect itself without harming others. (She would never hurt someone unintentionally- she’s incredible, and not made that way.) It stated that this is the animal that is good for extremely empathetic people because they will need a armored shell to keep themselves safe. And even to be able to roll up into a ball if they absolutely have to. And lastly, armadillo will show you how to armor up, and then when its safe to let your defenses down-which can be hard to discern. How do you stay open, and protected??

This is EXACTLY what she was going through.

We laughed and took turns shaking our heads. She was blown away. I was, per usual, in awe of such science and perfection. And- like always I said- "see, there's no way I could make this shit up." It was beyond my abilities and comprehension.

Any guide is just…you- your higher self/higher power, it is trying to communicate to you the things that you already know, but maybe forgot. This is to remind that you are not alone. And you are protected. And you get to protect more.

We never know what will show up to guide us. And if we ask and look, we might just get the confirmation and assistance you were needed- more than your conscious mind could ever conceptualize.

Heal on, Warriors. You’ve got this.

The Healing Journey Can Be Lonely...

Many years ago, I took a group of my healing training students to the Zen Temple for a Dharma Talk. The visiting monk was telling a story of drinking a beer with a friend. As he finished, he looked me right in the eye and said “it can be very lonely being a dharma teacher.” My eyes filled with tears. It hit me deeply, and I’ve carried that ever since. It was a time that I was feeling lonely on my path- and have revisited many times since.

There can be a tendency in the healing world to encourage people, no matter what stage or state they are in, to “just do it.” To move forward in that loneliness no matter what the cost. But that can be too hard, and not right for us sometimes. We can realize that this isn’t a “no pain, no gain” kinda thing. It’s sacred- and should be respected, just as we should respect ourselves. With our strengths. And vulnerabilities. 🙏

As a teacher of mine said “you don’t go deep sea diving with a snorkel…” Boy, isn’t that the case. We get to have the right equipment. Even if there is risk and pain involved- we can still get the right support along the way. We deserve that. 

So please make sure that you have the right support, that fits you, when you do deeper work. Self-healing, and all healing…is no joke. I love peeps and clients who take the right pace and discernment. 

As householders, “blowing up our lives” may not be the responsible thing to do. Especially now. Things cost more, in all ways, right now. 

Reminders: You can take your time. And take breaks. And back up, if you need to. Though some of us pitta peeps get thrown in the fire, so to speak- I encourage and pray for you to have some type of unconditional love and support along the way. If you are burning down your toxic village, higher power and/or a sweet animal can do it- with some good journaling, tapping, breathing and/or subconscious processing. (After years of “doing it alone,” I now have a great team, and you can always see my higher furry angel, Sam, in my stories…😍🥰❤️)

It can be lonely and tough enough just as it is. Let’s make it is easier by employing grace and love- and know there is no place we have to be, but here. And you are doing awesome. 💕💕💕